Getting a child with autism ready for a big trip is essential to the trip's success, I think. We haven't ever really tried it yet. We're going to Disney World, and these kids couldn't be more excited. All that Gavin talks about now is Disney World. Every day, he thinks we are going to go there immediately. He understands that we have to take an airplane, but I think he assumes it's just across town. Gavin hasn't been on an plane since he was a baby, so this trip to Disney World will be a huge event in his life. He's never been on a roller coaster, so who knows whats going to happen. There is plenty of fun stuff to do there besides thrill rides, so I know it will be a great time even if the big rides are too scary.
The things I worry about with him are the loud noises and lack of room to move. Gavin is tirelessly energetic, and requires an outlet for that energy, especially when over stimulated. He likes to just hop and skip around when he's excited, and there's not a lot of room for that type of activity on a jet. We do regularly make trips to Raleigh and Greensboro to see family,which are 2 and 3 hour jaunts, but he's used to that routine. He knows what to expect: chicken nuggets at the halfway point and hugs and kisses when we get there. This is a totally new endeavor. We are talking long lines at security, possible delays, and a very loud take off. Not to mention the painful eardrum pressurization upon take off! How do you prepare a kid for that? If you've got a child with autism, you probably understand the apprehension we feel. Chernobyl type nuclear meltdowns are not a fun start to a vacation. Hopefully we can avoid that!
To prepare Gavin, YouTube has been a huge help. We've been watching videos of airplanes taking off, landing, the safety instructional performance and just views of the interior of 747's. He knows its going to be loud. I crank the volume on these videos for him. I'm thinking of getting him some headphones to wear so he can listen to his favorites (Blues Traveler or the Cure) on the way down. He loves music in the car, and I've tried those little earbuds that came with my iPod on him but he won't keep them in very long. Or if they fall out in the middle of his favorite song - not good. High meltdown potential. There are also a lot of great videos of roller coasters on YouTube, filmed from the rider's perspective. Gavin's eyes get really big when he watches those. I'm not sure if he's going to like it or not. He loves going down the big huge slides at Monkey Joes by himself, so maybe he can handle some of these. We will start slow, at the Tea Cups maybe, and gradually work our way up to Space Mountain and beyond.
Through her friends on the autism parenting discussion boards, Sara has found out that we can get a special pass for Gavin when we get to Disney World. It will allow him to skip the lines and just get right on the rides (with me, of course). That will be extra nice. Waiting in a line for 30 minutes is just not an option for a child with autism. I'm not sure if we need to take a note from his doctor or how it works, but that is the only way we'd be able to do a trip to Disney. I can get him to wait for some things, like an eggo waffle in the toaster, for example. I just tell him to count to 20 or 40 or 100, however long I think it'll take to cook. He quits his bellyaching and starts carefully counting. Standing in a line at Disney, he would have to count to about 6500. We've never ventured much past 1000, and that old trick would wear out quickly.
Yes, the waiting is the hardest part. Especially the waiting for the day we actually get on the plane and go! When we first told Gavin about the trip, he woke up the next morning and said "Now, Disneyworld. Yay!" We decided to print out a simple calendar with just the days left on it until the trip, with a little picture of an airplane on the last day. Every day he marks off a day with an X and counts the remaining boxes. Its pretty funny, on any day since we've started doing the calendar countdown, you can ask him how many days left until "Airplane to Disneyworld" and he can tell you. He thinks about it constantly! This is actually a great way to make him aware of the concept of time. This is going to be a huge experience for all of us. I'm sure I'll have plenty of topics to write about when we get back!
This year's Easter Egg hunt was the first one Garrett actually participated in with enthusiasm and zeal. Last year, at 11 months old (upper photo) he was content to crawl to the first egg he saw and park there with it. Finding no great tastiness in its plastic yellow shell, I'm sure he was wondering what the big fuss was all about. Garrett was a great little crawler. I think he was even maybe an early crawler? I'm not sure, I'd have to ask Sara. What I do remember most was his crazy method of crab crawling on the grass, because he hated the feel of it. Garrett would get up on his handsand feet, sort of tip toe crawling around the lawn. It was so cute - and hilarious. We could probably send it in to America's Funniest Videos and win a prize. I need to learn how to post videos on this blog on my own instead of begging for my wife's help. I'm a carpenter, for Pete's sake. Not a webmaster! Anyway, Garrett didn't get it. Easter Egg, schmeester egg, he's saying.
Gavin was lovin' it though. He knew then and now it is what's on the inside that counts. You've gotta crack it open to find the good stuff! If you can't open it, bring it to dad. I'm more than willing to help for a small tasty fee. These types of events just get more fun each year, I think. As the kids get older, the magic of these events becomes more apparent to them and the anticipation is almost more than they can handle. Last friday night before we went to the church's Easter Egg hunt, Gavin was so excited he barely slept at all. Consequently, that Egg Hunt was fairly overwhelming for him. He got a few eggs, but mostly gazed in awe at the tornado of toddlers around him. Garrett remained focused, capturing eggs and insisting on inspecting the contents each time before plunking it in the basket.
Luckily enough for these kids, we did a smaller, exclusive egg hunt on Sunday. In more familiar territory (the back yard) they were both more in tune with the task at hand. With minimal prompting, both these kids filled their baskets in no time. Next year will be even more fun for me since I'll need to come up with more clever hiding places...
Gavin was embarrassed today! For the first time ever, I saw Gavin get red in the face and look very self conscious. He's nearly four (next week!) and he has Autism, so it is kind of a big deal to me. I feel like he's really healing when he shows tangible signs of a unique personality like that.
Here is what happened: We were at Fit for Fun, a cool little place downtown for toddlers and babies to hang out and play together. It's a great place. It's kind of a Saturday morning tradition for me and the boys to head downtown for a playdate at either Fit for Fun or Monkey Joe's. We were eating snacks at a toddler sized table and polishing our proficiency in barnyard animal sounds. All of a sudden, from behind Gavin came a little lad that recognized Gavin from school. "Hi Gavin!" he exclaimed. Gavin looked at him, completely caught off guard, then looked at me and in the same instant turned beet red. I was completely thunderstruck. Shyness! I couldn't help it, I just started roaring with laughter, elated to see this new show of his true character. I wanted to tell everybody there "HEY EVERYBODY! My son is EMBARRASSED! Can you believe it?" Of course, probably no one there would have grasped the depth of what I had seen, unless they too had a child stricken with Autism.
I don't go around introducing him as "Gavin, with Autism." So, a lot of people we encounter at the park and other places might not even see him as different. Yes, he's got some really odd behaviors, I guess. Maybe people do see him differently? I don't know. At any rate, I was pretty psyched when I saw that flash of individuality in him.
On the subject of potty training, I am really mystified. Gavin was using the toilet for about a week. He loved it! It was his favorite thing to do.
"Gavin, do you have to pee pee in the potty? Yes or no?" I'd ask.
"Yes!" he would shout with great enthusiasm.
Now, when I ask him the same question, he pretends not to hear, or runs away. What's the deal? Since he has autism, I'm thankful to get any kind of response to a question. Being able to ask "Yes or No" is extremely valuable. But why now is his standard reaction a nonverbal vamoose?
I think the answer is that the novelty of using the potty is gone. The honeymoon is over. It was fun for a week, but he's found that it is much easier to just let it go, on the go. Dirty pullups don't seem to bother him at all. We've tried the cool alert pullups. They haven't had an effect that I can measure, and I have reservations about the chemicals in them. There is one thing that motivates him like no other, and that is the "Cars" movie. Gavin absolutely loves the extra film that comes on the dvd called "Mater and the Ghostlight." We've turned that into a huge bonus prize for him to earn only if he poo poo's on the potty. He knows that the only time he gets to see Mater being chased all around Radiator Springs by the Ghostlight is after he does a number two. So far it's worked pretty well. One of us has to remind him that there is a great prize waiting in the dvd player if he succeeds. When he doesn't remember (which is most often) and I have to change his pullup, I remind him then that Mater is going to have to wait. He's always very regretful.
I love the way his brain works sometimes. He can be so funny. When he's sitting on the potty, just looking around and humming to himself, I remind him of the task at hand. I'll say "Get that poo poo in the water, so we can flush it away!" (He loves to flush the toilet) He looks at me thoughtfully for a moment, then coaxes "Come on poo poo, take a drink!" As if the poo poo is hiding, not wishing to be flushed. What a kid.
Gavin goes to a great little pre-school where they are working with him on this subject as well. They take him to the toilet every hour, and he has very few accidents. When Garrett is potty trained, I hope his older brother will finally catch on. Garrett seems ready now, so I guess we should be concentrating our efforts on him? Sometimes peers are the best teachers, I think. I just hope they're both in regular underwear by the time the third ankle biter arrives! Three rounds of diaper changes would be more than I could handle. God bless you parents of multiples! I don't know how you do it!
The transition from crib to bed isn't supposed to be easy, is it? Garrett has (almost) taken right to it! He loves sleeping in his little bed. The boys have a trundle bed from Ikea, very comfortable! Gavin is on the high part and Garrett gets the roll out bed. The problem is this: he has learned that he's free to roam the house at night if he chooses. I'm not sure if babies can sleepwalk or what, but he comes out of their room sometimes with a glazed look in his eye. He just wanders around. The other night I found him standing at the couch, sleeping with his face down in the cushion, sippy in hand. Weird! Does anybody know what is up with this? I'm afraid he's going to hurt himself some night. Thank God he can't unlock the doors, he'd probably meander on down the road if he could. He does it almost every night. He's scared me to death a couple times. I've opened my eyes at 2 a.m. to see him crouching like a gargoyle on the hope chest at the foot of the bed, a "Gotcha Daddy" grin on his face.
We use the Super Nanny technique of taking him back to the bed without saying a word, so he doesn't turn it into a game. It seems to work! That Super Nanny is awesome. I just wish Garrett would stay in bed all night! I don't want to put up a gate at their door, since we're also trying to get Gavin to use the potty at night on his own. This gives me a couple more t-shirt ideas: "Night Prowler" or "The baby that never sleeps" ...maybe?
Other than his nightly wanderings, Garrett is a great little sleeper. I can't really complain about either of my boys' sleeping habits. I've heard some real horror stories from other parents trying to make the transition. For Gavin's transition from the crib, we bought a bed tent that looked like a ladybug, since he was used to a crib that had a mesh tent over it. Sara found it on Amazon, I think. It had nice little pockets to hold the sippy cups inside. Gavin loved that part. So when we had to take the tent away and move Garrett to the trundle bed, I took Gavin to Target and bought some 99¢ car cup holders for him. They hook right on the bed. Sweet! He was so thrilled with his new cup holders, he didn't even notice the ladybug was gone. He finally got to enjoy the big green wall leaf thing (also from Ikea!) that hovers over the bed. I remember the first night for Gavin without the tent. We tucked him in and asked how he liked his new bed. "Green leaf." he said with a twinkle. You gotta love that!
On the subject of potty training, I am really mystified. Gavin was using the toilet for about a week. He loved it! It was his favorite thing to do.
The transition from crib to bed isn't supposed to be easy, is it? Garrett has (almost) taken right to it! He loves sleeping in his little bed. The boys have a trundle bed from Ikea, very comfortable! Gavin is on the high part and Garrett gets the roll out bed. The problem is this: he has learned that he's free to roam the house at night if he chooses. I'm not sure if babies can sleepwalk or what, but he comes out of their room sometimes with a glazed look in his eye. He just wanders around. The other night I found him standing at the couch, sleeping with his face down in the cushion, sippy in hand. Weird! Does anybody know what is up with this? I'm afraid he's going to hurt himself some night. Thank God he can't unlock the doors, he'd probably meander on down the road if he could. He does it almost every night. He's scared me to death a couple times. I've opened my eyes at 2 a.m. to see him crouching like a gargoyle on the hope chest at the foot of the bed, a "Gotcha Daddy" grin on his face.
